Thursday, November 1, 2012

Happy Halloween:)

Happy Halloween!  It truly was a happy day.  A tad nontraditional but happy none the less.  Surprisingly, there was not one single moment of sadness today.  Sure, it stung a little waving to my tiny gnome through the window as my elevator door closed, but catching her 2000th kiss and seeing her smiling eyes peek above her mask made it all okay somehow.  Chloe is  my strength, my rock, my complete and total sunshine.  She is the reason that I am able to catch my breath every morning as I drive into that hospital parking lot.  I learned from Chloe early on in this seemingly impossible journey that not even something a huge as cancer stands a chance in Hell when it comes to the joy that this beautiful angel spreads.  She is contagious, addictive, unbelievably unforgettable and her wicked dance moves are not be reckoned with.  She has danced her way into the hearts and souls of pretty much every staff member at Kaiser. From the house keeping crew to the oncologists, she has truly changed lives... Including mine.  Her spirit cannot be broken so I have no choice but to hang on and ride out the storm with my girl and ya know what????  It's proven to be the most "perfect storm".  Scary and completely unpredictable but absolutely perfect all the same.  Believe me, I have had serious words with my main man upstairs.  I have thrown myself on the floor of that hospital room on several occasions and pleaded with him to find some other way to execute his "plan".  Any plan that involves his most perfect creation violently vomiting blood can't be a productive one.  Right?  Honestly, I haven't even come close to being able to answer the, "why my Chloe Lord", but I have made peace with the fact that Chloe is exactly where she needs to be for exactly the right reasons.  I'm confident that it will all be crystal clear soon enough and I'm willing to wait... So is Chloe!

She is doing great!  She handling the Chemotherapy like the warrior she has always been and she is blowing everyone away with her strength.  Round 3 is starting on Friday and on Monday we will be officially halfway there!  Sadly it looks as though we may be in the hospital through February but that's okay.  We are doing just fine!

Miss Livvy Mae is absolutely amazing!  She is growing up so fast and reaching those milestones like a rockstar!  She will be cruising around in no time and I don't even want to imagine life with the two of them running through my house!  I can't wait!!

Halloween took on a whole new meaning this year...  Witnessing Livvy enjoying her very first Trick or Treating experience tonight was an incredible gift.  Wow!  Think about her last Halloween:(  I did and it brought tears to my eyes.  Happy tears!  My sweet, sweet cheetah Girl!

 Hopefully I'm getting back into the blogging groove!  Time will tell:)  I do have a Facebook page called Chloe's Corner that I do daily updates and post TONS of pictures on.  Please find us and join in!  


  1. Beth -- you captured so clearly the journey of traveling through cancer and other immense difficulties with a child who truly lives in the moment and knows how to access joy and love virtually every waking moment. It's humbling and beautiful and it completely helps us step up to the plate and try to be at least as brave and joy-filled in the hard times too. I am so grateful you are blogging again and I too teared up at the thought of Olivia's first Halloween. Amazing!!!

    There is joy in each day. There is love here too -- no matter the circumstances . Our children show us the way. You should take heart that by spreading this truth you can help others see it too. Thank you!!! ~Beth

  2. Happy Halloween! Chloe looks adorable in her gnome costume. And Livvy is just as cute in her costume. :)